So it grows: thoughts on the past, present and future

One of the questions I’m most commonly asked is whether I want to get back into journalism once the pandemic is over and life returns to normal, whatever that may be.

If you had asked me last summer, then my answer would have been an unequivocal yes to getting back into the newspaper industry. I still consider myself a wordsmith and often have to remind myself that I’m a farm worker and not a journalist these days.

But as the months have gone on and I’ve become more entrenched in farm life, I wonder if A) my previous employers will be able to offer a job given they’ve survived for nearly a year on a skeleton staff and B) whether I would be better off staying at Westlands.

I’ll take you all back to my last job and March 2020 when all this kicked off and found myself unemployed for the first time in my life.

I’ve been a news journalist for most of the century but have always enjoyed the arts and features side of things as it suits my writing style and personality. So when I was offered the chance to become the arts and features editor at the Farnham Herald in October 2019, there was no way I was going to turn it down.

I do miss the Farnham Herald office, especially the newsroom banter.

It was a fantastic and wonderfully varied job, interviewing celebrities and comedians, getting free tickets to shows and writing features about some amazing people and firms. I went to London to meet a young Farnham artist with an gallery exhibition in Mayfair, got told by Clive Anderson that I asked some good questions, and spent a very happy hour with the Bright Bricks team in Bordon, who specalise in making huge models out of Lego.

I built up good links with all the local theatres and had plenty of great features in the pipeline, like pretending to be Farnham’s town crier for the morning and lifting the lid on how the Boomtown Festival near Winchester is set up. Happy days indeed.

But then Covid started to spread and businesses started to panic. While many people buy newspapers for its content, they are largely funded by advertising revenue, which in turns pays for wages. The thickness of a newspaper is dependent on the number of adverts sold so if the revenue grows, there’s scope for more pages and a bigger staffing pool.

But when businesses close, go into mothballs or have nothing to advertise it’s very bad news for newspapers. If a paper has no advertising, there is no funding for producing content let alone employing staff.

The week before lockdown was a near fatal one for the Farnham Herald as the drop in advertising was so disastrous it left the paper on the financial brink. Difficult decisions had to be made and the freelancers, being free of contracts, were the first to go.

I was among the five who found themselves out of work: there was a nearly a century of experience between us and some very talented writers who were adept at everything from sport to sub-editing. They included a journalist and magazine editor who had interviewed the likes of David Bowie in her storied career and chief reporters who had devoted more than a decade to their respective patches.

After getting the news and finishing the day’s shift I spent around 40 minutes moping in a nearby pub before coming home and getting the biggest hug from my wonderful other half. I’m not ashamed to admit I cried a lot over the following week.

The experience felt like a death or splitting up with someone you were madly in love with. I went through all the associated emotions like denial, anger, bargaining and begrudging acceptance. Indeed, I still find it hard to accept that I might not possibly return to the Herald.

Yet I am not angry with my former bosses and I completely understand why the decision was taken to let me and the others go. The remaining staff have done an incredible job in keeping the various editions of the Herald and Petersfield Post running in this most difficult trading period and it’s thanks to the hardcore there still may be a newspaper for me to come back to.

I was lucky enough to find employment relatively quickly, and this blog has kept my writing fresh and the cogs whirring.

After losing my job at the Herald I had no source of income so I immediately started looking for work. I thought my advertising links from the Post and Meon Valley News would hold me in good stead so I sent a few emails to firms I had written glowing reports about in the past, but was disappointed to hear nothing from them.

I also applied for a couple of jobs at my first employers, Morrisons, but again the phone line remained silent. I laughed when I received an email out of the blue from the retailer last week about a position that might suit me but they didn’t take account of my whereabouts. I live in Portsmouth, while the opening was in Chorley, Lancashire. Bit of a commute, that.

As the weeks went on I got into DIY and cycling to keep myself busy and then I finally got the email from Graham at Westlands about a trial day and a possible job (see my first post). The rest is history and after a shaky start involving accidents and few opportunities to speak English, I’m now a firm part of the team with a contract, pension and ever-increasingly grasp of Bulgarian.

Thank you, Rumyana, for this gem of a picture. I think I'm taking clips off the guide wires, but can't be totally sure.

The downside to farm work is that a lot of it can be repetitive and I’m often exhausted by the end of the day. Aches and early nights have become commonplace along with new and slightly worrying clicks around my shoulder, ribs and right knee.

But there’s been plenty of upsides as my mental and physical health has benefited immensely from farm work. I’ve lost three stone and love my new slim physique, especially as my arm and chest muscles are developing. I can easily fit into shirts I hadn’t previously worn for a decade, I’m never stressed and I’m happy, despite the continuing Covid sh*tstorm that continues to batter the UK and the world.

I also have to smile at the way my purchases have changed. This time last year I would have been buying notebooks, pens and enquiring about a new laptop, while my most recent buys have included thermal socks, flasks, overalls and a knife. I was especially excited about the last one and love the way it cuts through twine like the proverbial hot knife through butter.

My employers have been wonderful and I genuinely feel part of the team. Ryan’s brother, Mike, also recently joined and we’ve worked together for most of the last month with the company and friendly competition being thoroughly enjoyable.

It’s all about prepping the farm for the picking season at the moment and although it’s been incredibly hard work, I’m also looking forward to the summer and seeing everyone reaping the benefits of our efforts during the winter.

I can see a better summer for my previous employers, too. With the Covid vaccination programme well underway and lockdown restrictions likely to be eased in the coming months, I expect life to slowly return to normal. Retailers will eventually reopen and they will want to promote the fact they’re open for business again, so the likes of the Herald and Post will no doubt benefit from a little more advertising revenue.

Perhaps I’m being overly optimistic, but I would like to think the Herald can’t survive on a skeleton staff forever and they will need to bolster their numbers eventually. If they do want me back, I would be open to a return.

But it would be hard to leave Westlands and I feel truly indebted to Graham for everything he and his farm have given me during an unprecedented period. Yes, the wages were better at the Herald and I miss all the perks and office banter, but money isn’t everything and there’s a matter of loyalty.

I appreciate that’s a cliche, but I’m struggling to weigh up whether money or happiness is more important going forward. So when it comes to the question “what will I be?”, I guess I’ll have to reply with the obvious. We’ll just have to wait and see.